Terribly sorry to tarry but I’m a terrible friend
I’m an empathetic listener and loyal to the end
But when it comes to remembering how and where friendship extends
Inattention tends to sever what addiction doesn’t spend

I inadvertently ignore everyone extraneous in my life
Draw the line just past my kids circling back behind my wife
I got a few truly blues with whom I’ve shared strife
But for daily interactions I cut you out like a knife

Though I strive to live graciously and keep things droll
I know down in my soul I’m a total asshole
And though there’s a lot more I care about as a whole
I get a lump of coal forming friendships as a goal

I got a lotta problematic behaviors I’d like to strangle
Like punching holes in plaster when I can’t master my anger
I’m dangerous when I let my inner demons have a rager
Relationships maintained like a hermitty Lone Ranger

No stranger to terrible things a terrible friend does
Leave you wondering just because how close we really was
When we crawled through the trenches while above the bullets buzzed
Maybe just fast food my memory’s a bit fuzzed

Coworkers that I bond with on the job every day
Then I drop from your spot not a lot I got to say
Do you ever hear from me after work? No way
Cuz I’m a jerk who prefers to be alone when I play

Go away everybody and just leave me alone
Interpersonal Interaction extracts from introverted bones
Too many hours at work and my body starts to jones
For the lab where I can repeat and record these wicked tones

Headphones driving nine inch nails deep into my skull
Problematic to perceive anything that’s past the pull
I could rhyme like a puppet on parade like a bull
But no matter how many rhythms funneled in it’s never full

I’m a terrible friend to most of the many people that I know
Anxiety’s impropriety from the word go
When it comes to picking up the social cues I’m pretty slow
Slummin with the drugees not following up yup I blow

So I retreat into my room and make some sick ass beats
And blast ‘em on the internet before I hit the sheets
Social media feeds with unlimited tweets
Tease sweets but only yield me repeated defeats

I can’t help but think if I had just interacted
A bit more with the people the path of my life attracted
I may not have overreacted and then retracted
The number of people that listen when I speak has been impacted

I enacted certain corrections to my behavior to allow
Friendly greetings to people who aren’t yet my friends now
Can’t lay low in Underdark like a drow
When your life is tied solid to the cow and the plow

How now do I speak about the terrible trends
That set me on the path of being such a terrible friend
It doesn’t matter as long as said behavior comes to an end
I’ll try to make amends like an addict on the mend

While I blend my confession with some amateur ass loops
Hoping loosely that these lyrics somehow rally the troops
Friends can’t assist if they aren’t in on the scoop
So spill it while you’re goofin’ out on the front stoop

If the poop hits the fan and you can’t count on your buddies
That’s when the waters of the spirit get muddy
This giddy fuddy duddy fumbling over words that rhyme
Is trying to say that I might have misspent some of my time

Could have cultivated a culture if not for a closed mind
Ended up a vulture beat a dead horse blind
But it’s never too far away in time again I find
To change the way the hands of god’s watch unwind

SAMPLES
“Terrible Lie”, Nine Inch Nails, Pretty Hate Machine